Week 10: toward one more draft/editing sesh
Some resources for us (Google docs):
- What does this look like, with notes (lorum ipsum+celery flow chart+annotated comments
- Last year's OHitS/AMA (Q&A about this memo just BEFORE turning in for grade)
Today, I chain back to pick up a few grammar/puntuation lessons from an earlier week. You can find them at the end of Week 8: Update on Friday, October 21, 2022 at 07:55AM
- That which (takes a comma)
- Alot v a lot
On Wedneday we will look at semicolon/colon. And, anything else in this space.
Few craft choices I will emphasize today:
strategic use of YOUR voice within the memo (not just the polite first-person opening and closing paras
counting out in complex or long paragraphs
three cup choices, two of them disposal
four stages of LCS (origin/materials, transport, use, disposal)
both of the long paras where you summarize the Moore or Hocking peer reviewed research articles can be best handled by dividing into parts (your LCA paragraph is a transition to this work and sets you up to count).
HINT: use the stage names as part of your counting out. This is a named counting categories strategy.
Be safe tonight, ok?
Marybeth Shea
Recall that transitions strategies are your friend! First up, the overall binding strategy is to pay attention to the beginning and end of paragraphs (as you know). Here is your Lego memory helper for that.
You can also use meta discourse of first person phrases -- within the memo -- that clue the reading that you are either:
-
-
- leaping
- shifting
- pivoting, or
- punting.
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Here is a checklist for the coffee cup memo (Google Sheet). You can also review this Trait list from the most recent Review Task that was due on Monday, late evening.
I will open up the next Writing Task for this Friday-Saturday-Sunday-Monday Review Task on Thursday AM.
Marybeth Shea
Happy Friday and your protected time to manage your work! I am available online today between 9-9:50, 10-10:50 and 11-11:50. Here is your GoogleMeet code (same for all Fridays this semester).
Three common lapses (noted in the Eli Review Writing Task prompt) include:
- not using formal citation with the Moore (Team Paper) or Hocking (Team Styro) paragraphs that you summarize; relatedly,->
- not using curated links that you use for referral or punting; and
- not acknowledging the reasonableness of the other position, including a formal citation to direct reader to that information.
One critical thinking skill we practice here is achieve "flow" both in the writing and in the cognitive of the reader. In this assignment, we work to achieve flow across complexity and contrast when the science in unclear.
Some boilerplate language you can use, based on some questions emailed to me yesterday:
Having defined LCA, let's look now at Martin Hocking's work on . . . (or, insert Charles Moore)
As you can see, Hocking's work is, essentially, an LCA on disposable hot beverage cups.
Moore's work focused primarily on the end phase of the LCA. Here, the key idea noted earlier about how "leaky" both disposal and recycling systems are. Essentially, we do not landfill and recycle near as much of both cup materials that we think; hence, we experience now a critical volume of aquatic plastic.
Should you need more information on climate change and energy efficiency, see this helpful and brief article at..., which summarizes the science-based work of the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC).
For purposes of this cursory analysis (short analysis, first-cut look, quick-and-dirty examination), we will now turn to Moore's groundbreaking work on ocean plastic.
Recall, that my recommendation relies both on:
- my opening assumption about ocean plastic (or climate change) and
- LCA as a decision criteria
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