Week 5: wrapping up the rain garden memo; taking stock of learning
Hello, on this mild but overcast Monday.
We deepen our skills on this definition memo, for the audience, context, purpose (yours and the reader's). First up is bookending, then, we look anew about counting out (this episode is brought to you by the number two), and a renewed look at how stasis theory helps you distill content into nimble, readable, and helpful documents.
Bookending is a way to show your reader WHERE the cited information comes from, and where this information ends.
Here is an example, which underscores that bookending is a technique that improves paragraph coherence:
Rain gardens have two components, to perform their pollution and water/erosion control functions: below ground structure and above ground structure, where the plants are. According to the helpful design manual from the Low Impact Development Center, Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Cras lacinia placerat rutrum. Integer et commodo dolor, condimentum suscipit massa. Suspendisse vel quam elit. Donec nec facilisis nunc. Duis congue consequat orci, vel pharetra nibh efficitur vitae. Aliquam ornare cursus commodo. Donec ac nulla venenatis, bibendum urna sed, congue risus. Nulla ut orci velit. Praesent lectus lacus, rutrum at dapibus quis, vestibulum in erat. Nulla pharetra congue placerat. Nulla convallis, mauris non finibus fringilla, erat felis mollis ipsum, ut gravida ex mauris quis ligula. Suspendisse a ex vel justo euismod congue id nec augue. Aenean pulvinar dictum neque. Proin nec nibh ac enim accumsan volutpat. You can access this guide here, which will show you both the soil and living materials needed.
Technical writing craft note: Bookending relies on signal phrases, typically at the opening of the bookending sentence. Then, bookending is powerful in the closing sentence, where you tell the reading that the information in this citation language ends here. This way, you help read see -- eventually -- in a paragraph with more than one source, which information goes with which citation.
I posted a link last week to OWL on signal phrases. Here are a few to use, other than the powerful "according to":
argue, assert, claim, comment, confirm, contend, declare, deny, emphasize, illustrate, imply, insist, note, observe, point out, report, respond, say, suggest, think, and write.
YourDictionary.com offers an excellent curated list of signal phrases. Highly recommended! Micro lesson: should I have repeated the link to OWL here? Are you irritated as a reader to have to scroll back?
Next, another bookending=signal phrase+referral link citation example:
Rain gardens have two components, to perform their pollution and water/erosion control functions: below ground structure and above ground structure, where the plants are. See the helpful design manual (2009) from the Prince George's County Departmnt of the Environment, sectetur adipiscing elit. Cras lacinia placerat rutrum. Integer et commodo dolor, condimentum suscipit massa. Suspendisse vel quam elit. Donec nec facilisis nunc. Duis congue consequat orci, vel pharetra nibh efficitur vitae. Aliquam ornare cursus commodo. Donec ac nulla venenatis, bibendum urna sed, congue risus. Nulla ut orci velit. Praesent lectus lacus, rutrum at dapibus quis, vestibulum in erat. Nulla pharetra congue placerat. Nulla convallis, mauris non finibus fringilla, erat felis mollis ipsum, ut gravida ex mauris quis ligula. Suspendisse a ex vel justo euismod congue id nec augue. Aenean pulvinar dictum neque. Proin nec nibh ac enim accumsan volutpat. You can access this manual here (caution! 250+ page PDF), which will show you both the soil and living materials needed. I can also suggest these two example rain gardens, included on a 4 page PDF brochure about University of Maryland installations.
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I expect you to use at least one bookended referral citation in each of your illustrating and classifying paragraphs. This is one of the most common lapses in the rain garden memo. Do it, not just because I request. Do this so you learn the technique to use in real-world writing that matters to you. Do you see how bookending gives you a place to think about curated referral links?
Pivot to formal citation: Use formal APA citation in the Davis' paragraph about evaluation where you make a class. Note: announcing Davis early in the paragraph for his expertise and foundational work on bioremediation IS A SIGNAL PHRASE MOVE. In this way, you are bookending here, too! You can use bookending with in text citation. From above:
See the Bioretention Design Manual (2009) from the Prince George's County Department of the Environment, sectetur adipiscing elit.
You would pair this in text, parenthetical citation in the body of your memo with this at the end of the memo:
Prince George's County. (2009). Design Manual for Use of Bioretention in Stormwater Management. Prince George's County, MD Department of Environmental Protection. Watershed Protection Branch, Landover, MD. Digital version, based on 1997 first publication and updated 2009.
Other examples you can borrow from:
Davis pioneered his rain garden work with a 19897 paper in Environmental Science Today. Here are two takeaways from that paper about the effectiveness of storm water retention and pollution remediation: 1) Aliquam ornare cursus commodo. Donec 57 percent nulla venenatis, bibendum urna sed, congue risus. Nulla ut orci velit. Praesent up to 87 liters per stormwater eventlectus lacus, rutrum at dapibus quis, vestibulum in erat. 2) Nulla pharetra congue placerat. Nulla convallis, mauris non finibus fringilla, erat felis mollis ipsum, ut gravida ex mauris quis ligula. The full paper is included with a link in the biblograph at the end of my memo. You can see an open access summary at this abstrat. (LINK)
Counting out! I want you to see the counting out technique at the paragraph level and the document level. The magic number for the rain garden memo is two:
- Two related environmental problems: storm water events and pollution carried in that water.
- Rain gardens have form and function that address these two problems (form and function -- two!)
- Rain garden (RG) form 1 = above ground biotic plant material. RG form 2=below ground = layers of soil and media, in a depression.
- Two bits of evidence that reflect this pattern of two is that we can use the logos of numbers from Alan Davis/Low Impact Development Center about
- volume of water remediated?
- percentage/quantifier of sample pollution type remediated.
Back to stasis theory and the rain garden. We looked at this briefly three weeks ago. Now, you are in a better position to look at this with newer understanding.
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Rain garden memo is "due" for a grade on Friday, 27! The parking lot opens then, giving you a week for this work. Metaphor? Act like you are parking at BWI to go away. You are in long term parking and you can pick up the car when you return. How is that?
Use groupme this week to ask each other for refined writing and details. You can also ask me questions, seriously!
Tonight, you have your last ER REVIEWING TASK DUE. Help each other and yourself. BE ON TIME. I expect that many will be busy with this today as we have three people who have completed. Looking forward to what you write in support of each other.
Marybeth Shea
Thank you for 100% completion on the ER REVIEWING TASK. Huzzah!
Quick sound test (western meadowlark with occasional cow in background); BBC making available a huge, open-use sound archive.
Polite first-person opening.
P1 -- NO CITATION NEEDED as is simple common knowledge of a well established technology
P2 -- CLASSIFYING: You can build your ethos by including references in natural language (supports curated referral links, too)to help your reader trust you as well as find additional sources that the reader chooses:
Marybeth noted that both Prince Georges' County and the University of Maryland played key originating roles in developing this technology, as well as evaluation this technology. As you know, she is a trained botanist.
The Wikipedia "rain garden" entry is quite good, however, the "history" section misattributes the inventor to Dick Brinker. Actually, according to a conversation with Marybeth, Larry Coffman...... HERE, add link
P3 -- ILLUSTRATION -- for details on plants and soil layers, perhaps the BEST referral sources are either the Low Impact Development Center (founded by Larry Coffman) and/or the P.G County Bioretention Manual, but curate the links as in P2 and other other examples I gave. Readers hate to be sent to large PDF w/o warning.
P4 -- EVALUATION --Use a formal citation style for the engineering curriculum material as Davis is a co-author. Recall here that you are using a short, open access standing for a paywalled peer review piece by Davis. Our boss cannot find/access on her smart phone under this meeting deadline.
P5-- Police 1st person closing.
Gathering of sources discussed thus far:
- visit the Low Impact Development Center
- Prince George's County. 1993. Design Manual for Use of Bioretention in Stormwater Management. Prince George's County, MD Department of Environmental Protection. Watershed Protection Branch, Landover, MD. See this digital version->
- Bioretention Manual (Report). Landover, MD: Prince George's County, Department of Environmental Resources. 2002. Archived from the original on 2009-04-22.
- SAMPLE for EVALUATION PARA: Davis, A. (2011). "WATER QUALITY IMPROVEMENT USING RAIN GARDENS: UNIVERSITY OF MARYLAND STUDIES" (PDF).
TLDnR? Use curated referral citation links that Jane can refer to LATER. Or, she can forward that email to a contact she encounters in the meeting.
Use a formal citation for the Davis paragraph? Why, we are making a claim!
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NEW!
RESOURCES (3): 1) Checklist! Note: you can ignore the anything marked in "purple" cells, as we have not spoken fully about these elements (thinking and craft) but will take them up next week.
(2 and 3)
PUNCTUATION Craft lesson 1: ...rain gardens that... or ...rain gardens, which.... (is a bit complicated but the punctuation is NOT. This little witch hat will help you remember that which takes a comma. Like 99% of the time.
That-which: which takes a comma; that does not! See this handout on choosing which and that.
Marybeth Shea
Happy Friday. Eli Review WRITING TASK/PARKING LOT to submit memo for a grade here. I also updated your ELMS calendar and sent this by ELMS mail.
Variations you can try in the rain garden memo, if you like. Totally your choice.-->
- Break a very long paragraph into two, to help your reader. Take care with transitions so that your reader can see that the two paragraphs treat one larger topic.
- Divide classifying paragraph into the low impact/bioretention way to address the environmental problem of storm water and carried pollutants into local water sheds; and 2) answer the journalism Qs of who, where, when, (the what is in the first paragraph just described.
- Divide the illustrating paragraph into two, based on the above-ground and below-ground content, if you are wordy or offer many details to also show how the infiltration or absorption is accomplished by the soil media layers, within a natural or built depression. Then, you can note -- IF YOU WANT -- the phytoremediation role of plants that uptake heavy metals by hyperaccumulation as well as all plants taking up both hydrocarbons and a good measure of N and P.
- For the evaluation paragraph, you may want to close the memo with a separate and brief optional paragraph on cost-effectiveness (we will discuss the differences in class re Larry Hogan as a republican and Wes Moore as a democrat.
- You can even offer the two examples of rain gardens, by curated links, as an additional short paragraph. Here are the places that work:
- If your illustrating paragraph is relatively short, place here.
- You can make a small paragraph after the illustrating paragraph that simple is the two curated links.
- You can place them in the last paragraph, where you close the memo in first person.
- You can make a tiny paragraph as per number 2 above and just place at the end as a kind of back matter.
- We also will have another contextual way you can consider this that involves "playing" in our Leaf it To Us case. Here, at the beginning of your memo simply state your scene in this play, like:
- I plan to send the two links in a follow up memo when Jane returns.
- I will mention the links/local examples at a staff meeting, offering to send to all iinterested.
- Just tell Jane in the break room about the local rain gardens she could visit; then, you send her a map with two locations pinned.
See how writing at work appears in a context?
Wrapping up this memo means we can image Kermit in a wetlands environment.