MbShea@PWP@English@UMCP

Style:  lots of choices to achieve a subtle yet powerful effect. One part of audience accomodation is to write in a style appropriate to the audience, context, and purpose.  Let's talk more about empty subjects.  This html worksheet shows many simple examples.

By the way, this ESL website contains a helpful review of grammar, particularly with short but clear examples. Back to empty subjects:  I asked you to pay attention particularly to It/THere at the beginning of sentences. Now, you need to look at interior positions of an emtpy subject after an opening clause.  You will need to revise away THOSE emtpy subjects.  Example: 

• Since the early 1990s, there are many low impact development examples, including rain gardens.
• Due to the effects of urbanization, it is now important to use sustainable land management techniques.

We discussed the Oxford comma on Monday. Compare these pairs of sentences for tight clari

• Science Daily is reporting on two solutions to climate change, mosquito vaccinations and off-shore drilling.
• Science Daily is reporting on two solutions to climate change, mosquito vaccinations, and off-shore drilling.

• Breast cancer is typically treated with chemotherapy, immunotherapy, or surgery.  
• Breast cancer is typically treated with chemotherapy, immunotherapy or surgery.

Think about these funny things:

• Strippers! 
• Breakfast!

Here are links to document handouts for reading. However, you have already read them, right?

• Sentence Patterns
  
• Buffy and Sentences
• Pitch the Verb

And, on to paragraphs:

• Paragraph Definition: think Architectures
• Paragraph Types

STYLE and CLARITY TIP: We also talked about strategic renaming of subjects rather than relying overmuch on pronouns like 'they' and 'it.'

Penelope used the F54 Pipetting Stilleto at her bench. The F54 Pipetting Stilleto performs two actions at once: puncturing the nuclear membrane and delivering the desired solution of metal ions. This pipette system is attached to an electron microscope screen, which permits both viewing and recording of the piercing action.  This system is fast becoming....

While we are talking about paragraphs, here is an arrangment for the coffee cup memo (using cognitive wedge, stasis steps, and the concision discipline of memo:

Polite first/second person opening

Reveal which environmental problem you weight more heavily in this analysis 

Description para with quanitfiers about office problem

Review briefly the three choices in two categories -- Use two paragraphs 1) compare contrast of paper/styrofoam 2) description of ceramic option as main reuse-able

Define life cycle analysis (LCA) (needs source) and explain that this technique is your main decision criteria

Hocking's work OPTIONAL PLACEMENT FOR THIS PARA

Define carbon footprint briefly, with focus on energy, then mention water (re-usable) and landfill problem (paper and styrofoam); connect to life cycle para, as energy use your primary decision criteria

Moore's work OPTIONAL PLACEMENT FOR THIS PARA 

Recommendation paragraph (use bold title to flag this part of the memo)

Acknowledgement of other readings of the options (counter argument)

Example paragraph

Polite closing, with emphasis on helping Jane (second person)

More style/grammar/puncutation/convention items from your papers:

• that v.who (things v. people)
• punctuation with quotation marks, the US convention
• commas with appositives (extra information or details, set off by TWO commas)
• More on why commas matter:
  • Let's eat grandma.
  • Let's eat, grandma.
• Dr. Davis.....Davis.....Davis.....
• Davis and Davis et al
• Davis's and Davis'

 Apostrophes?  They matter too.