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Oops, science is POWERFUL!
ENGL 390, 390H, and (sometimes) 398V Class Journal
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Week 7: coffee cup work AND selected technical article for Assignment 3
Good morning, fine Terp-Sci Wri students.
DUE TONIGHT! Monday's ER REVIEWING TASK. Help each other out by being on time for each other. Friday's ER WRITING TASK is draft 3 of the memo. Next week? Parking lot opens for my grading of the memo. Then, we move on to the last assignment: One-article close review. Preview by flow chart linked here, in our celery green color now familar to you.
Let's have a lesson on writing craft that is a sub-category: document design. Document design covers a range of sub-sub topics but here, our focus is on formatting the words upon the page into "chunks" that are governed by styles guides, including MLA and APA. Here is block quote (PARA 5, the LCA paragraph) from my dissertation-->
In Braiding Sweetgrass: Indigenous Wisdom, Scientific Knowledge and the Teachings of Plants, ecologist Robin Wall Kimmerer notes:
Even a wounded world is feeding us. Even a wounded world holds us, giving us moments of wonder and joy. I choose joy over despair. Not because I have my head in the sand, but because joy is what the earth gives me daily and I must return the gift. Kimmerer (2015)
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At the end of the document, here is what is my very last citation in my 300+ bibliography-->
Kimmerer, R. W. (2015). Braiding sweetgrass. Milkweed Editions.
Note, this is too short for a hanging indent. Always be learning. Here is what one looks like for a longer paper by RWK. Recall that the hanging indent in a long bibliography helps a reader find a desired citation because the last name sits out in a "panhandle." (I did a screen shot of this reference below, using large font to focus on the "shape" of the hanging indent.)
Now, here is a visual metaphor to remember the look of a hanging indent.
How to do these indents? In Scribbr, this short article will help you in both MS Word and in Google Docs.
Shall we focus on some additional details within the coffee cup memo?
- Common knowledge is still a topic of uncertainty for many of you. Hint: common knowledge determination is hard and varies by audience/context/purpose. This Scribbr short article will help you.
- PARA 4: At the level of detail in this writing scenario (short recommendation report in memo for work), you do
- NOT have to use formal references for the mention of climate change problem scope (IPCC is your most authoritative reference, not paywalled, and is perfect for the referral link, CURATED, naturally.) OR the mention of the ocean/aquatic plastic problem emerging documentation (Algalita Foundation or Charles Moore Research Institute are authoritative, not paywalled, and are perfect for the referral link.).
- NEED to reference formally the Moore peer reviewed article or the Hocking peer reviewed article in your evaluation paragraph.
- Please note, that referral links give you the opportunity to "cover your behind" (CYA) about plagiarism concerns. So, you should be psychologically comforted by this informal reference technique.
- PARA 4: At the level of detail in this writing scenario (short recommendation report in memo for work), you do
- Acknowledging the other frame/green cup in the recommendation at the end of the memo. You can do this in a number of ways, beginning with the sample sentences I have given you. Another way to manage this is to use referral links to unpaywalled sources about the other problem and the research. For example, you could
- TEAM STYRO: Send the reader to a Moore open access link. Build Moore's reputation by a brief sentence about their ethos. OR
- TEAM PAPER: Send the reader to a Hocking open access link (harder). Build Hocking's reputation by a brief sentence about their ethos.
- OPTION: you could remind about incommensurality, defined in Week 6.
- OPTION: you could note that social behavior is at the heart of this problem because people pretty much know that a re-usuable option (after using many times to outweigh the energy and pollution associated with glass, ceramic, and metal production).
- Confusion about where definition stops and analysis begins: Roughly, PARA 5, the LCA paragraph is the pivot point from description that is necessary to set up the problem resolution.
Now, topical reflection on how logos, pathos, and ethos overlap in a real example (20 second YourTube clis)-->
Wednesday and is chilly. Shifting from hoodie to sweater!
Friday begins our last set of ER for the coffee cup memo--> WRITING TASK (Friday night) and REVIEWING TASK (I read and consider all posts to write a prompt) that I open midday on Saturday, giving you time to think/respond by Monday evening.
Let me gather our current round up resources for this work:
- Check list in Google Sheet
- Dummy text for coffee cup memo (helps with voice shifts noted below)
- Celery-green flow chart (linked in the Google Sheet as an audience-friendly act for YOU)
- Two Google Docs from previous semesters that are FAQ-organized.
- Office Hours in the Sky 1 (note, this is an archived resource and not active for our class)
- Round up of most of the free content you may use
- Cognitive frame here is mentor text. What are mentor text approaches to writing? TLDR? Here is a visual clip from that University of Maryland Writing Project: (I am a board member of this k-16 professional group.)
Now, what do I focus on when I grade you?
- topic sentences and transitions to thread the cognition for the reader
- referral links for courtesy and to punt/bunt (writer) that give the reader a choose-your-own adventure option (Para 4)
- bookending the links so reader can tell what information traces to the informal but powerful linked sources
- use of first person voice strategically BUT third person voice in much of the prose
- acknowledgment of the other frame
- use of the founder sources/highest ethos sources I give you
Here are some nice choices I see in your work that are worth wider adoption:
- PROBLEM QUANTIFICATION: Global data but local description/with quantifiers (Para 2). Sample --> The Galactic Union of Hot Beverages Society notes that in the Rigel Galaxy, 7.8 parsecs of disposal cups are used daily. In our office, i note that the two recycle bins and one large trash bin are routinely filled with a mixture of cups. For our 25 employees and five weekly visitors, I estimate that we use X disposable cups weekly, This means our annual cup use is about Y.
- Three writers suggest that we spend more time on this problem description together. One person notes that the fossil fuel industry is at the heart of both problems.
- Another writer suggests that we plan a project examining social behavior and how to "nudge" toward better behavior. Writer notes the disciplinary origin of nudge. I will let you search and see how new Google serves up the knowledge.
- Finally, a few students include encouraging information on microbes that can consume plastic. You could conclude on that sort of knowledge but looking specifically at styrofoam, which is a kind of plastic.
Friday feeling! No one does this better than Robert Smith of the Cure. Enjoy! Such singable punk. My favorite kind of punk :) !
Here digitally between 9-950 and 11-11:50. Complete your ER WRITING TASK TONIGHT! Some of you are behind on several previous tasks. Sigh. Procrastination is human but can hurt you. Take care, students! Stay in the sci-wri game we play together.
Here is a graphic by Gemma Correll, British artist, for Evernote. Many artists use evernote to organize sharing small art files with users and possible patrons. This style is becoming known as sketchnote (encouraging short definition) or elementary school teacher art. Simply put: sketchnote style combines handwritten text with simple sketches to illustrate a concept.
A company capitlizes on this -- Sketchnote! -- of course. See the exciting punctuation here aka the dashes. Technically this is an en-dash, which is created by two hyphens (old school typewriter days).
You can use sketchnote style to prep for exams by doodling key concepts as images or even just connection phrases with arrows or in Venn-style diagrams. Hope that helps you. I used to use sketchnote practices on the whiteboards of in-person teaching. Miss those days.
Week 6: Coffee cup memo relies on description v. analysis framing
Happy Monday. Tonight, your ER REVIEWING TASK is due. You WILL gain knowledge as you help each other. As in the case of the rain garden memo, you will see two things:
- level of detail (just right! Not too much, not too little, aka the Goldilocks sweet spot)
- where to place details(which paragraph showcases the detail best?)
And for you? You can draft off each other in a cycling or aerodynamic way. In this short 2017 web article from Cycling Tips is this quote:
So how much energy can you save from drafting? Interestingly, there seems to be little consensus among researchers that have investigated this topic. Studies have shown drag reductions of between 27% and 50% for riders that are drafting, with the exact reduction depending on a number of variables — the size and on-the-bike position of the rider in front, likewise with the rider drafting, the distance from the wheel in front, the direction and strength of the wind, and more.
(de Vroet, Matthew)
This, just above, shows how to do a block quote (option for you re your life cycle assessment (LCA) paragraph. Paraphrase is fine. USE THE FOUNDER definition from EPA. Please.
We are still working off WEEK 5's guidance below, especially the flow chart (pale yellow-green large image). I have resources on framing/thinking:
- Focus on difference between description and analysis (key critical thinking skill) in this linked google doc (skim the embedded links, please)
- Metadiscourse (counting out is a metadiscourse strategy) and voice propel the complexity forward with flow (science examples in this short google doc)
- Note that description, combined with analysis, supports recommendations
- look at the last sentence of each paragraph;
- then look at the first sentence in the next paragraph.
Do you see connection between content, including a reasonable pivot to new information? The paragraphs, although they stand alone in topic and content, should CONNECT or TRANSITION with the surrounding paragraphs.
Paragraph check: Ask
- What is the paragraph doing in the document? What type of paragraph serves this purpose? For example, a narrative paragraph can tell a brief story or present a case or example. An illustrative paragraph – cousin to descriptive paragraphs - paints a picture.
- Is the paragraph cohesive? Does the content “hang” together? Do the sentence choices achieve cohesion? Look at the transition words and phrases in the OWL link above. You can use them to achieve cohesion and flow between sentences. This focus is called local coherence, which is key to achieving flow.
Finally, paragraphs do not truly stand alone in most documents. Paragraphs combine to provide coherent content in a document for a reader. Ask this: do the paragraphs fit and support the arrangement or structure of the document? Focus on transitions between paragraphs, which help with cohesion in the document. Local coherence (within a paragraph) + global coherence (between paragraphs and within a document) create overall flow.
Cheap! Way To achieve cohesion between paragraphs try "chaining" by transitions. Place the topic of the next paragraph in the last sentence of the preceding paragraph. The first sentence of the new paragraph must include that topic also. Doing this knits or binds the paragraphs to each other. Here is how a math person would say this:
Let ParaA be the preceding paragraph.
Let ParaB be the following paragraph.
Let T be the topic that should appear in both paragraphs.
- the last sentence of ParaA and the
- first sentence of ParaB.
In reality, ParaA and ParaB exist in a document with an arrangement of many paragraphs.
ParaA relates to ParaB through the last sentence of ParaA AND SIMULTANEOUSLY through the first sentence of ParaB. The relating elements is a topic, T; T can be a repeated word or a phrase. Some variation on T makes for good style.
Tight transitions pivot on repetition of key word or short phrase. Loose transitions allow a topic substitution or phrase (selected with care for reader knowledge/background).
Food for thought: You also can use the transition space to punt or jump to another subtopic in the memo. Phrases:
Having reminded you of the central emergency of climate change, let's turn now to...
Now that you have more details on the emerging problem of ocean plastic, we can look at...
Recall that this memo is a short back-of-the-envelope analysis for our purposes. We can reconsider these frames more carefully but would face the incommensurability problem.
Wednesday preview:
- will talk about informal (IPPCC and Algalita Foundation) and formal sources (Hocking and Moore)
- "punting" with curated linked referral citations
- cautions about the ethos of who shares information from peer reviewed research
- discussion (critical thinking) on the incommensurability of direct comparison of climate change problem with ocean plastic problem and how to note and then punt (this link really needs curation: TBD in class)
Helpful short video to think about the complexity here of the linked problems of pollution (CO2, single use plastic) and depletion (stress upon a resource: climate system and ocean/water system. Think cycles: carbon and water). From UMD genius Herman Daly.
Short follow-up on Monday's mega-post: punting by referral link. This is especially useful when noting the seriousness of your environmental problem. What is a punt (football) or even a bunt (baseball)? The metaphor in writing means we can point readers to a source to consider complexity outside of the through-line of the document. In other words, we are not going to explain everything about
- climate change (refer them to an open access Intergovermental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) source -- caution! Huge PDFs) OR
- ocean plastic (refer them to Algalita Foundation (open access and html pages)
This type of referral link reminds me of the books designed in a choose-your-own-adventure. You give audiences a helpful path to go down but do not require all readers to do this. Look at how audience-friendly hypertext is for you to refer readers!
Refinement on when to cite in common knowledge areas: specific details!
The Algalita Foundation, created by Charles Moore, PhD, educates and acts on the serious problem of ocean plastic. Recently, the scope expanded to address freshwater and brackish water. The Foundation identifies at least nine giant garbage patches in the Pacific Ocean alone. A recent study by the associated Charles Moore Research Institute noted that 67% of freshwater watersheds within 50 miles of cities at a threshold population level of 50,00 contained detectable microplastic residues (Shea, 2027).
The IPPC "Policymaker Summaries) between 2018-2023) warn about temperature rises above the modeled 1.5C by 2050. However, the 2023 Synthesis Report (Summary for Policymakers linked here) cautions that many scientists warn that the future may be more dire than modeled due to feedback loops within the ocean and air carbon cycles that are accelerating global change conditions. See especially, pages 4x-8q).
TBD in class.
Another resource can be this QA session from a previous class.
Happy Friday. More Nobel Prize news below. I will be available between
- 9-9:50
- 11-11:50
You have an Eli Review WRITING TASK due tonight (draft 2 of 3). Please respond so that you can participate in the REVIEWING TASK, which I will open mid day bases upon what alll y'all compose. That task is due Monday evening, as per usual. BE ON TIME FOR EACH OTHER! Hint: this is a make-or-brake moment for most in the class.
If you do not have ELMS mail grades/reflection from me re your rain garden memo, you MUST CONTACT ME ABOUT THIS assignment.
For chemistry: Congratulations to (Google Deep Mind CEO) Demis Hassabis (five minute interview video on Nobel site, includes transcript) and Dr. John Jumper (Nobel site; 3 minute video)for being awarded the 2024 Nobel Prize in Chemistry for their work developing AlphaFold, a groundbreaking AI system that predicts the 3D structure of proteins. Comp Sc+chemistry (lots of biochemistry in there). Good visual, courtesy of Compound Interest-->
Here is another visual, from the Nobel website-->
Some of you may have "played" Fold-It, a citizen science precursor to this AI-assisted protein study tool.
Also, did you see or try to see the northern lights last night? I did. Did not film well and you might have to know how to look. I grew up seeing them all the time. Search on images in Google, with Washington DC in your terms and you will be treated to a feast! Here is my little photo. Purple maroon above blue twilight. Made my Montana heart so glad.
Week 5: on to the short recommendation (policy) memo/report
Happy rainy Monday to all of you. I had no idea this was happening! Kermit performed on campus, last Friday. Wonder if Turner Daily will make a dragonfly ripple ice cream, as suggested?
Eight submissions to ER thus far. Read all of them twice. Started my grading guidance sheet and will begin grades via ELMS email. What good work, demonstrating the techniques with variations. I am learning so much. Thank you. For the rest of you? Just ge this in, asap (said gently) and move on to thinking about which hot beverage cup -- styrofoam (class of plastic) or paper -- embodies a better sustainability profile. According to science.
This NEW memo content is more complex and wide-ranging. Transitions are a way to thread the cognition for our busy readers. Your first memo focused on the definition stasis, with a evaluation move at the end.
Now, our wants a problem-solution memo about the type of coffee cup we use in our firm. Therefore, we need to frame this work with the stasis of policy (what ought we do).
Let's start by reading this short science news article from Science Daly.
Back to our boss: Jane wants a coffee cup policy for the office that is "green." OK, that is the content for your invention. Here is rough working arrangement (paragraphs):
POLITE OPENING, with your recommendation that previews your final policy paragraph
CONJECTURE PARAGRAPH Problem description (our office situation, with quantifiers), with reference to national. international size of the problem
CONTEXT PARA(s) Environmental problems (energy efficiency ->climate change AND persistence of plastic in ocean -> food chain disruption)
YOUR WEIGHTED PROBLEM SOLVING METHOD (revealing your pre-analytical frame or bias)
DEFINITION-->CAUSE/EFFECT information
Coffee cup types (how many? Can we do this in one paragraph or do we need one per coffee cup type? Use counting technique of two or three)
PIVOT PARA from background to ANALYSIS PARAS/narrows in on you work. Tells your analysis process.
Decision criteria (HINT: Life cycle analysis, and define this; use an EPA source) HERE, this definition helps us move to the VALUE paragraphs
CAUSE/EFFECT continued (system) -->VALUE (Harm or benefit)
Martin Hocking's work on life cycle analysis of paper v. Styrofoam
Charles Moore's work on size of ocean garbage patches
POLICY/ RECOMMENDATION (restate your recommendation, with qualifiers, as one does in science land)
Science/Research support (remind about evidence discussed above in VALUING PARAGRAPHS)
Qualification (concede reasonableness of the other position)
Concrete examples (2)
Sentences that can help you as topic sentences or transitions sentences between paragraphs
Any analysis of coffee cup choice requires use of life cycle analysis.
Life cycle analysis -- also known as cradle-to-grave -- helps capture the entire environmental effect from origin and inputs through use and, importantly, to disposal.
In my analysis, I weight [name environmental problem] more heavily than [the other problem].
Life cycle analysis can help us understand this difficult question about coffee cup sustainability
We have two choices in coffee cups: paper or plastic (Styrofoam).
Martin Hocking conducted the first -- and to date ,only -- peer-reviewed analysis of the energy embodied in coffee cup choices. (OR/Remix)
Charles Moore is among the first to alert us to the huge problem of persistent ocean plastic.
We will work through the above over the next two weeks, using stasis theory. More on that later this week. However, you are using the full five steps more fully than in rain garden work (primarily definition).
Lesson on paragraphs, here for early in your memo, in the definition/description move (STASIS 2) where we also need to address context. Skill?: Coherence in a paragraph (sample content but the paragraphs might not be complete for the purposes of your coffee cup paper):
"Meh" paragraph
Plastic and paper cups pose problems for recycling. Ceramic cups are very energy intensive to produce. Recycling seems environmentally-sound. Paper does not degrade deep within most landfills and the plastic coating is also difficult. Not all plastic can be recycled. You need to check the bottom of the container. Landfills are increasingly full. There is a huge "patch of garbage" in the Pacific Ocean. Supply chains of garbage recycling, especially plastic do not really work.
Note: can you see the compare/contrast move here, even in this meh or necessary draft version?
Better paragraph
Paper and plastic both pose disposal problems. First, not all plastic can be recycled. Check the bottom of the plastic container. "No. 1" and "No. 2" types can be recycled by most facilities. Second, paper does not degrade deep within most landfills because of low oxygen conditions. The plastic coating also interferes with decay. Landfills are increasingly full. There are several huge "patches of garbage" in the Pacific Ocean. Recent analysis suggest that China is a source of this garbage.
Note: do you see a place for a referral citation, using the Seattle news article posted earlier? Can you find a more general article that you can refer to, about the limits of recycling and landfilling? Recall that this iinformation, now, at this level of detail is common knowledge, even if you do know this.
Even better paragraph (can you see the re-thinking of content as well as sentence-level revision)
Paper and plastic both pose disposal problems. First, not all plastic can be recycled. Check the bottom of the plastic container. "No. 1" and "No. 2" types can be recycled by most facilities. Second, paper does not degrade deep within most landfills because of low oxygen conditions. The plastic coating also interferes with decay. Landfills are increasingly full, with paper and plastic part of the waste stream. Not all plastic is recycled or landfilled. According to the Algalita Foundation, huge "patches" of garbage in the Pacific Ocean are further evidence of of the environmental harm posed by plastic.
Notes: 1) is that referral link well curated? do you see another place for a referral citation? Should we build a new paragraph with this iNY Times nformation or this 2022 Science Daly piece noted earlier.
Happy Wednesday. Your Eli Review WRITING TASK is posted. BE ON TIME FRIDAY FOR EACH OTHER. Try to do about 70 percent of what is asked. Within your groups, you will see how others approach this difficult prompt. Is a kind of drafting in both writing and in cycling! Our class is a bit like a peleton. Again, I am metaphor-making Marybeth.
Important Google doc rounding up guidance for you. Hint: you will refer to this often, so copy link into your workspace.
Sources and knowledge type: Most of what we work with is common knowledge, even if you do know this information. Still, we can use sources -- especially as curated referral links -- to buidl credibility (without formal citation) and help the reader to valuable information.
Note: Do not think of citation as only a way to avoid the plagiarism police. Think about citation as a two-part ethical act:
- Credit to the original or innovation or highly quantified details (otherwise, you commit theft. Stealing ideas, particular ways of telling, and (often) highly quantified details is wrong. Do not do this because you are moral person AND you want others to see you that way. Builds your credibility. Readers more likely to trust you.
- Courtesy to the reader. Save them time researching. Point to available and credible sources. You also benefit be creating trust between you and your audience. Props to you, then. Serve others and serve yourself. Win-Win. Human community benefits because trust is important soil glue.
Round up of sources you may use (not in any particular order:
- New York Times piece on limits of recycling. Platform note: if you are on campus wifi, you have access. Otherwise, you hit a paywall.
- You will need to understand and define (for Jane, your reader) what life cycle analysis or life cycle assessment is. Go to EPA and search on one. You wll find several. You will use this definition midway through your recommendation report. I will let you google that. :)
- Caution on using environmental organizations for cup recommendations. We will discuss advocacy work vs. analysis work. You can, however, 1) look at who they cite (ethos) and 2) consider the Natural Resources Defense Council as this is one of the science-central environmental sources.
- Watch out for greenwashing by foam and by paper companies.
- More generally, commercial entities sell us stuff. Primary goal. Driftaway Coffee is an example? Are they evil? No! But, not the best source for analysis of cup type virtues.
For the evaluation work -- paragraphs relying on peer review research, you will need a cite or two for either
Martin Hocking (use your campus library research tools to example lit. Hint: two pieces from the early 90s are easily found.)
Charles Moore (we will discuss his advocate and analysis roles) is a co-author on many marine biology and ocean science pieces. Find one or two.
Hint: work-arounds for peer reviewed research/excellent science journalism summaries (open access) are at:
Happy Friday.
Still grading your rain garden memos. When you post -- if you do -- over the weekend, send me an email to just ping me that you have done so. Thank you.
Am looking forward to what you do with draft one of three due TONIGHT toward the coffee cup memo. Note: if you are celebrating high holy days through this time, send me a quick note. I can develop a workaround for you that we could arrange on mid day Sunday.
As per ususal, am available here: 9-9:50 and 11-11:50.
Here is a fun research meme-->
BTW, what is a meme anyway? The answer is rooted in science, actually. A meme is a "unit of cultural information spread by imitation." British evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins coined this term. He took meme from the Greek mimema meaning “imitated,"introducing this in his book The Selfish Gene (1976).
What are mixed methods approaches in science? According to the National Institutes of Health (undated 40 pg PDF), mixed methods intentionally combines quantitative and qualitative research methods to draw on the strengths of each. In doing so, complex research questions may be explored more fully by use of combined methods. (paraphrase of this definition)
What are mixed methods approaches in science? A 2022 description paper hosted at the National Library of Medicine (US NIH) explains mixed methods research in health disciplines this way:
The overall goal of the mixed-methods research design is to provide a better and deeper understanding, by providing a fuller picture that can enhance description and understanding of the phenomena [4]. Mixed-methods research has become popular because it uses quantitative and qualitative data in one single study which provides stronger inference than using either approach on its own [4]. In other words, a mixed-methods paper helps to understand the holistic picture from meanings obtained from interviews or observation to the prevalence of traits in a population obtained from surveys, which add depth and breadth to the study. (Wasti)
(at the end of your document, you would use this bib cite for Wasti-->
Wasti SP, Simkhada P, van Teijlingen ER, Sathian B, Banerjee I. The Growing Importance of Mixed-Methods Research in Health. Nepal J Epidemiol. 2022 Mar 31;12(1):1175-1178. doi: 10.3126/nje.v12i1.43633. PMID: 35528457; PMCID: PMC9057171.
We will talk more on Monday about these two ways to incorporate quoted materials into our documents. Enjoy the weekend.
Week 5: wrapping up the rain garden memo; taking stock of learning
Hello, on this mild but overcast Monday.
We deepen our skills on this definition memo, for the audience, context, purpose (yours and the reader's). First up is bookending, then, we look anew about counting out (this episode is brought to you by the number two), and a renewed look at how stasis theory helps you distill content into nimble, readable, and helpful documents.
Bookending is a way to show your reader WHERE the cited information comes from, and where this information ends.
Here is an example, which underscores that bookending is a technique that improves paragraph coherence:
Rain gardens have two components, to perform their pollution and water/erosion control functions: below ground structure and above ground structure, where the plants are. According to the helpful design manual from the Low Impact Development Center, Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Cras lacinia placerat rutrum. Integer et commodo dolor, condimentum suscipit massa. Suspendisse vel quam elit. Donec nec facilisis nunc. Duis congue consequat orci, vel pharetra nibh efficitur vitae. Aliquam ornare cursus commodo. Donec ac nulla venenatis, bibendum urna sed, congue risus. Nulla ut orci velit. Praesent lectus lacus, rutrum at dapibus quis, vestibulum in erat. Nulla pharetra congue placerat. Nulla convallis, mauris non finibus fringilla, erat felis mollis ipsum, ut gravida ex mauris quis ligula. Suspendisse a ex vel justo euismod congue id nec augue. Aenean pulvinar dictum neque. Proin nec nibh ac enim accumsan volutpat. You can access this guide here, which will show you both the soil and living materials needed.
Technical writing craft note: Bookending relies on signal phrases, typically at the opening of the bookending sentence. Then, bookending is powerful in the closing sentence, where you tell the reading that the information in this citation language ends here. This way, you help read see -- eventually -- in a paragraph with more than one source, which information goes with which citation.
I posted a link last week to OWL on signal phrases. Here are a few to use, other than the powerful "according to":
argue, assert, claim, comment, confirm, contend, declare, deny, emphasize, illustrate, imply, insist, note, observe, point out, report, respond, say, suggest, think, and write.
YourDictionary.com offers an excellent curated list of signal phrases. Highly recommended! Micro lesson: should I have repeated the link to OWL here? Are you irritated as a reader to have to scroll back?
Next, another bookending=signal phrase+referral link citation example:
Rain gardens have two components, to perform their pollution and water/erosion control functions: below ground structure and above ground structure, where the plants are. See the helpful design manual (2009) from the Prince George's County Departmnt of the Environment, sectetur adipiscing elit. Cras lacinia placerat rutrum. Integer et commodo dolor, condimentum suscipit massa. Suspendisse vel quam elit. Donec nec facilisis nunc. Duis congue consequat orci, vel pharetra nibh efficitur vitae. Aliquam ornare cursus commodo. Donec ac nulla venenatis, bibendum urna sed, congue risus. Nulla ut orci velit. Praesent lectus lacus, rutrum at dapibus quis, vestibulum in erat. Nulla pharetra congue placerat. Nulla convallis, mauris non finibus fringilla, erat felis mollis ipsum, ut gravida ex mauris quis ligula. Suspendisse a ex vel justo euismod congue id nec augue. Aenean pulvinar dictum neque. Proin nec nibh ac enim accumsan volutpat. You can access this manual here (caution! 250+ page PDF), which will show you both the soil and living materials needed. I can also suggest these two example rain gardens, included on a 4 page PDF brochure about University of Maryland installations.
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I expect you to use at least one bookended referral citation in each of your illustrating and classifying paragraphs. This is one of the most common lapses in the rain garden memo. Do it, not just because I request. Do this so you learn the technique to use in real-world writing that matters to you. Do you see how bookending gives you a place to think about curated referral links?
Pivot to formal citation: Use formal APA citation in the Davis' paragraph about evaluation where you make a class. Note: announcing Davis early in the paragraph for his expertise and foundational work on bioremediation IS A SIGNAL PHRASE MOVE. In this way, you are bookending here, too! You can use bookending with in text citation. From above:
See the Bioretention Design Manual (2009) from the Prince George's County Department of the Environment, sectetur adipiscing elit.
You would pair this in text, parenthetical citation in the body of your memo with this at the end of the memo:
Prince George's County. (2009). Design Manual for Use of Bioretention in Stormwater Management. Prince George's County, MD Department of Environmental Protection. Watershed Protection Branch, Landover, MD. Digital version, based on 1997 first publication and updated 2009.
Other examples you can borrow from:
Davis pioneered his rain garden work with a 19897 paper in Environmental Science Today. Here are two takeaways from that paper about the effectiveness of storm water retention and pollution remediation: 1) Aliquam ornare cursus commodo. Donec 57 percent nulla venenatis, bibendum urna sed, congue risus. Nulla ut orci velit. Praesent up to 87 liters per stormwater eventlectus lacus, rutrum at dapibus quis, vestibulum in erat. 2) Nulla pharetra congue placerat. Nulla convallis, mauris non finibus fringilla, erat felis mollis ipsum, ut gravida ex mauris quis ligula. The full paper is included with a link in the biblograph at the end of my memo. You can see an open access summary at this abstrat. (LINK)
Counting out! I want you to see the counting out technique at the paragraph level and the document level. The magic number for the rain garden memo is two:
- Two related environmental problems: storm water events and pollution carried in that water.
- Rain gardens have form and function that address these two problems (form and function -- two!)
- Rain garden (RG) form 1 = above ground biotic plant material. RG form 2=below ground = layers of soil and media, in a depression.
- Two bits of evidence that reflect this pattern of two is that we can use the logos of numbers from Alan Davis/Low Impact Development Center about
- volume of water remediated?
- percentage/quantifier of sample pollution type remediated.
Back to stasis theory and the rain garden. We looked at this briefly three weeks ago. Now, you are in a better position to look at this with newer understanding.
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Rain garden memo is "due" for a grade on Friday, 27! The parking lot opens then, giving you a week for this work. Metaphor? Act like you are parking at BWI to go away. You are in long term parking and you can pick up the car when you return. How is that?
Use groupme this week to ask each other for refined writing and details. You can also ask me questions, seriously!
Tonight, you have your last ER REVIEWING TASK DUE. Help each other and yourself. BE ON TIME. I expect that many will be busy with this today as we have three people who have completed. Looking forward to what you write in support of each other.
Thank you for 100% completion on the ER REVIEWING TASK. Huzzah!
Quick sound test (western meadowlark with occasional cow in background); BBC making available a huge, open-use sound archive.
Polite first-person opening.
P1 -- NO CITATION NEEDED as is simple common knowledge of a well established technology
P2 -- CLASSIFYING: You can build your ethos by including references in natural language (supports curated referral links, too)to help your reader trust you as well as find additional sources that the reader chooses:
Marybeth noted that both Prince Georges' County and the University of Maryland played key originating roles in developing this technology, as well as evaluation this technology. As you know, she is a trained botanist.
The Wikipedia "rain garden" entry is quite good, however, the "history" section misattributes the inventor to Dick Brinker. Actually, according to a conversation with Marybeth, Larry Coffman...... HERE, add link
P3 -- ILLUSTRATION -- for details on plants and soil layers, perhaps the BEST referral sources are either the Low Impact Development Center (founded by Larry Coffman) and/or the P.G County Bioretention Manual, but curate the links as in P2 and other other examples I gave. Readers hate to be sent to large PDF w/o warning.
P4 -- EVALUATION --Use a formal citation style for the engineering curriculum material as Davis is a co-author. Recall here that you are using a short, open access standing for a paywalled peer review piece by Davis. Our boss cannot find/access on her smart phone under this meeting deadline.
P5-- Police 1st person closing.
Gathering of sources discussed thus far:
- visit the Low Impact Development Center
- Prince George's County. 1993. Design Manual for Use of Bioretention in Stormwater Management. Prince George's County, MD Department of Environmental Protection. Watershed Protection Branch, Landover, MD. See this digital version->
- Bioretention Manual (Report). Landover, MD: Prince George's County, Department of Environmental Resources. 2002. Archived from the original on 2009-04-22.
- SAMPLE for EVALUATION PARA: Davis, A. (2011). "WATER QUALITY IMPROVEMENT USING RAIN GARDENS: UNIVERSITY OF MARYLAND STUDIES" (PDF).
TLDnR? Use curated referral citation links that Jane can refer to LATER. Or, she can forward that email to a contact she encounters in the meeting.
Use a formal citation for the Davis paragraph? Why, we are making a claim!
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NEW!
RESOURCES (3): 1) Checklist! Note: you can ignore the anything marked in "purple" cells, as we have not spoken fully about these elements (thinking and craft) but will take them up next week.
(2 and 3)
PUNCTUATION Craft lesson 1: ...rain gardens that... or ...rain gardens, which.... (is a bit complicated but the punctuation is NOT. This little witch hat will help you remember that which takes a comma. Like 99% of the time.
That-which: which takes a comma; that does not! See this handout on choosing which and that.
Happy Friday. Eli Review WRITING TASK/PARKING LOT to submit memo for a grade here. I also updated your ELMS calendar and sent this by ELMS mail.
Variations you can try in the rain garden memo, if you like. Totally your choice.-->
- Break a very long paragraph into two, to help your reader. Take care with transitions so that your reader can see that the two paragraphs treat one larger topic.
- Divide classifying paragraph into the low impact/bioretention way to address the environmental problem of storm water and carried pollutants into local water sheds; and 2) answer the journalism Qs of who, where, when, (the what is in the first paragraph just described.
- Divide the illustrating paragraph into two, based on the above-ground and below-ground content, if you are wordy or offer many details to also show how the infiltration or absorption is accomplished by the soil media layers, within a natural or built depression. Then, you can note -- IF YOU WANT -- the phytoremediation role of plants that uptake heavy metals by hyperaccumulation as well as all plants taking up both hydrocarbons and a good measure of N and P.
- For the evaluation paragraph, you may want to close the memo with a separate and brief optional paragraph on cost-effectiveness (we will discuss the differences in class re Larry Hogan as a republican and Wes Moore as a democrat.
- You can even offer the two examples of rain gardens, by curated links, as an additional short paragraph. Here are the places that work:
- If your illustrating paragraph is relatively short, place here.
- You can make a small paragraph after the illustrating paragraph that simple is the two curated links.
- You can place them in the last paragraph, where you close the memo in first person.
- You can make a tiny paragraph as per number 2 above and just place at the end as a kind of back matter.
- We also will have another contextual way you can consider this that involves "playing" in our Leaf it To Us case. Here, at the beginning of your memo simply state your scene in this play, like:
- I plan to send the two links in a follow up memo when Jane returns.
- I will mention the links/local examples at a staff meeting, offering to send to all iinterested.
- Just tell Jane in the break room about the local rain gardens she could visit; then, you send her a map with two locations pinned.
See how writing at work appears in a context?
Wrapping up this memo means we can image Kermit in a wetlands environment.
Week 4: rain garden continues, with sentence and paragraph details
Thank you for such a good response to the Eli Review (ER) Writing Task. I assigned four reviews per person, which is not as burdensom a load as you might think. Note that you, the writer, benefit from seeing what others writer. Win-win!
Due tonight is your Reviewing Task; see ER or use the ELMS calendar to click in. BE ON TIME FOR EACH OTHER.
Knitting up from last week, I want to talk about paragraph jobs. Yes, paragraphs have a job, which is related to YOUR purpose as a writing.
- Brief, Working Definition (what is a rain garden, briefly, by two functions)
- Classification (what type of technology is this? Hint: low impact development and storm water management)
- Extended Description (Illustrative; give detail on the layers of soil and the type of plants; best to divide the complex material into two parts, plants/function and soil layers/function)
- include two examples; consider the ones on campus (can be sep. para OR placed at end of doc)
- Evaluation (is this low impact technology good or bad? Use Dr. Davis' research as you do not have authority to evaluate based on your expertise)
I want to ask return to the sentence handlouts of last week. I hope you scanned them as you will see simple, elegant ways to improve your sentence game, especially in two paragraph positions:
- topic sentence position
- transition sentence position
Placing them here for your convenience (see my strategic redundancy and meta discourse, to help you the reader aka audience?)
Now, let's think about sentences (Google doc one-pagers):
Sentence Patterns (Bruce Ross Larson)
BLUF? Subject-verb placement early in the sentence is cognitive-frame strategy of keeping your audience within the subject as you unleash knowledge and complexity. You can think of the subject-verb pair of words as needing to follow a LEGO principle most of the time. Can you hear the click?
Rainy Wednesday, here.
Writing craft idea today that should make two things easier:
- Sorting your details into the classifying paragraph and the illustrating paragraph; and
- Learning more about the power of paragraphs.
Here are the two sub-organizing ideas by paragraph "job" in your memo:
- The classifying paragraph establishes context and builds confidence for the reader about why rain gardens are a "thing". You can use the journalism DubbU formula and answer these questions briefly in this paragraph:
- Who (Larry Davis)
- What (rain gardens, also called bioretention, is a type of low impact development)
- Why (low cost, effective storm water management)
- Where (Prince George's County in the Somerset development)
- When (early 1990s)
- The illustrating paragraph paints a picture and helps Jane "see" how this works in a two-part analysis that compares and contrasts:
- gather the abiotic details into one part of the paragraph
- pivot on a transition element within the paragraph*
- gather the biotic details into the other part of the paragraph
Preview of citation in these two paragraphs. Use a curated referral link per each paragraph. Here, the goal for Jane when she follows up, is that you are pointing her to several authoritative links. You save her time. In a way, you keep her from the problem of "let me google that" with deep, deep sarcasm voice and look.
Phrases you can use for curation:
Blue Baltimore, an environmental NGO, describes the design of rain gardens quite well. Note the helpful cross section diagram here and here.
The "bible" of bioretention is the PG County Bioretention Manual. Shee this link; HOWEVER, the pdf is over 270 pages.
Marybeth, well versed in low impact development and water quality, described this history. You can also find details at the Low Impact Development Center pages (link). The Wikipedia articles on X, Z, and Y are actually quite helpful.
Now, preview of evaluation paragraph aka the Davis paragraph, where formal citation (Google doc on how to approach) supports your claim.Skills within the evaluation paragraph:
-
Signal phrases (we will look at OWL again)
-
demonstrate ethos of Davis’ expertise early on,
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logos of numbers in this paragraph: support with two details from Davis that quantify your claim with evidence.
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how to use formal (APA in-text+bib entry at memo's end) and informal (curated referral link) citation together. (See linked Google doc above in this bulleted list).
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Sources for Alan Davis (work through his pages here to select a sources for curation).
SAMPLE PARA: Alan Davis studies rain garden effectiveness, having pioneered this work with Larry Coffman. Nunc id neque eget urna pharetra rutrum. Nulla a sapien a turpis consectetur maximus. According to several recent peer reviewed studies... Quisque sagittis ornare sapien, id consequat leo posuere dapibus. One study in particular...(Davis, 1066). Phasellus pulvinar velit ac purus consectetur vulputate. Davis’ large body of work confirms that rain gardens address...Fusce ultricies This 1638 study focused on stormwater removal. Davis and colleagues found that 8 trillion gallons of water .....(Davis and Needleman) ullamcorper felis, eu tristique dui. Integer at. In a 1492 study focused on hydrocarbon absorption (one of three classes of water borne pollutants)m, researchers found that up to 67% of automotive hydrocarbons were incorporated into plant biomass..... metus vitae nibh efficitur posuere non in ex. Nunc in lorem id lorem hendrerit dapibus nec in metus. Quisque venenatis sagittis dui, id ullamcorper augue accumsan accumsan. These two websites (UMD Campus web exhibit; Chesapeake Bay foundation short explainer) give a picture of how Davis’ study rain gardens work (not behind a paywall). Curabitur sit amet velit rhoncus, euismod nibh ac, fermentum orci. This research page on the 1877 study includes a highly detailed abstract that you can read. Nullam sit amet rhoncus augue.
Preview: ways to close the memo
- Give curated links to two MD examples-->
Here are two short web exhibits that show two Maryland-located rain gardens:
Nullam sit amet, includes cross section, rhoncus augue. LINK
Nullam sit amet rhoncus augue, was designed in part to address flooding in Hyattsville by a UMD Landscape architect in 2001. LINK
- Hint at qualifying research or emerging new work:
Some researchers warn that under the anticipated warmer, wetter Maryland (Bosch report, summary linked here), many adequate bioretention installations will fail under larger, more frequent rain events.
Because some plants hyperaccumulate heavy metals, composting the plant material here is not advices in home gardens or in agricultural applications. See me for more detail.
I found this information about X. Let me know if this aspect of rain gardens is useful to you. We can discuss.
*Order can be switched. Sample sentences for this work-->
Rain gardens have two components: layers of percolation material and carefully chosen plants.
The soil media layers act like a sponge, with the goal of infiltrating storm water slowly the goal of this abiotic portion of the rain garden.
Next, the biotic portion of the rain garden... (Mini lesson here: next implies sequence; HOWEVER, you want to signal a shift from one part of the compare to the others. Stronger metadisource words include:
Turning now.. or Let's turn to... (mini lesson: one is third person, other is second person or first person plural
Having described the engineering soil/ponding function, we can examine the types of plants that form the phytoremediation function. (mini lesson: focus on function in this paragraph underscores how rain gardens work)
These two related forms of abiotic and biotic parts work together to function on the two linked environmental problems of storm water management and sequestering (trapping) of pollutants. (nice summary sentence, here. Could be at end of paragraph to lead into the transtion).
How effective are rain gardens? The technology is mature, with a rich body of technical literature.
Allen Davis studies (mini lesson: what do we conclude from Allen Davis studied....?)
Happy Friday, everybody Am here: 9-9:50 and 11-11:50.
DO NOT FORGET YOUR ELI REVIEW WRITING TASK. If you do not post something, you cannot be including in the Reviewing step. Remember, I give you (free) labor grades based on this work. Remember, doing this HELPS YOU HELP OTHERS AND YOURSELF.
For fun, check out this short slide set (working/draft where I collect anime/kawaii sci comm images). Remember Pusheen on the first day? Well, why not have fun while we think and work so diligently on science.
Here are some links to short reads about such visuals in science (for fun! not required):
- Science blog by Dan Hickson on this Sarah Roh cover/illustration (above) at paywalled Journal of Organic Chemistry issue.
- This Wikipedia article on pikachurin will delight you. (Discovery and Nomenclature section) Related is 7 minutes video (U Rochester biochemistry) on the Sonic Hedgehog proteins you may know about.
In closing, can you guess what this depicts? From a former student in an MdPhd program now.