MbShea@PWP@English@UMCP

Good morning, hot beverage-obsessed!

We approach spring break, which splits up our drafting/reviewing/revising.  Never fear, I will support you through this.  I hope you can cogitate upon the problem during the break. Nothing improves thinking/writing more than time, punctuated by insight and consideration.

One resource, especially for those who want to work ahead is this Q&A document from previous sections. The Google doc is locked but the questions are perennial.

Now, let's talk about thinking.  Here are few points about why this recommendation memo is so hard-->

• incommensurability -- without common measure (option seven-minute video explainer)
• life cycle assessment/analysis (LCA) -- a cradle-to-grave analysis that primarily uses the frame of energy efficient.
  • Note: LCA analysis also has boundaries.  For example, LCA experts (I am one, actually), note aspects like national, international, and even regional boundaries (geographic).  We also deal with the problem of problem framing, sometimes calling this pre-analytical condition a boundary edge. For example, LCA work is starting to consider human health aspects, though this work is new and without many data sets to work with.
    • I am aware of emerging LCA work (Germany, primarily, with EU colleagues) on material accumulation chains, that now encompass the physical limits of recycling, landfilling, incineration, and the like.  Think: solid waste is pollution that takes space when we sink the material.
    • I am also aware of efforts to look at the ocean, with particular problems for both climate change (ocean warming is part of planetary warming) and accumulation of ocean plastic.  A sub area of concern here is bioaccumulation in food chains/food security/human health.
• human problem-solving is complex and we do truly need to work on more than one problem at a time
  • however, our analysis typically must drill down to details and portions of problems
  • later, we can attempt synthesis and priority areas for human problem-solving
• human problem require knowledge from the social sciences and the humanities.  One conjecture would be why do we keep using single-use disposal options when we KNOW that these choices have serious environmental outcome that harm us all?
  • You can look at the free rider problem (explains a rational for that behavior) from economics and
  • the idea of nudging people in complex systems toward pro-social behavior

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Now, many examples about the Oxford comma and why/how you should use in 99% of all writing. TLDR? Use the Oxford comma.  We start with the book inscription example, classic; I was taught with the first example, circa 1978.

To my parents, Ayn Rand and God.

To my parents, J.K. Rowling and God.

To my parents, Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart.

Now, we move to problems in newsprint. However, we should note that the paper and magazine style choices do not require an Oxford comma (will elaborate in class). In a newspaper account of a documentary about Merle Haggard:

Among those interviewed were his two ex-wives, Kris Kristofferson and Robert Duvall.

These two preceding examples are from Theresa and Nielson Hayden. Here is another doosie that cries out for a serial or Oxford comma. Many of these examples appear in the serial comma entry at Wikipedia. I can attest, as both a student and teacher, that these examples and similar ones appeared in teaching contexts even before they were placed in Wikipedia.  I am sourcing these, again, as object lessons in citation, giving credit, sharing common knowledge, and building ethos with you.

The Times once published an unintentionally humorous description of a Peter Ustinov documentary, noting that

"highlights of his global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector."

Now, to be clear, the serial comma does not always solve ambiguity problems, again captured in Wikipedia:

They went to Oregon with Betty, a maid and a cook –

• They went to Oregon with Betty, who was a maid and a cook. (One person)
• They went to Oregon with Betty, both a maid and a cook. (One person)
• They went to Oregon with Betty, a maid and cook. (One person)
• They went to Oregon with Betty (a maid) and a cook. (Two people)
• They went to Oregon with Betty, a maid, and with a cook. (Two people)
• They went to Oregon with Betty – a maid – and a cook. (Two people)
• They went to Oregon with the maid Betty and a cook. (Two people)
• They went to Oregon with a cook and Betty, a maid. (Two people)
• They went to Oregon with Betty as well as a maid and a cook. (Three people)
• They went to Oregon with Betty and a maid and a cook. (Three people)
• They went to Oregon with Betty, one maid and a cook. (Three people)
• They went to Oregon with a maid, a cook, and Betty. (Three people)

I use italics to help you focus on nuance meaning.  Punctuation helps us with nuance, however imperfectly.

We can also look at the grocery list problem (me and so many teachers, not necessarily Wikipedia): 

buying  bread, jam, coffee, cream, juice, eggs, and bacon. VS

eating toast and jam, coffee and cream, juice, and bacon and eggs

Finally, we have a theme song to remember this punctuation convention. 

Happy Monday.

Let's start with a writing craft lesson on sentence and a strategic choice to name your content immediate, early on in the sentence. Linguists call this approach to avoid empty subjects in your writing.  How often?  I suggest about 90 percent of the time.  We will talk more about this craft choice and where you can "lighten up" within a document or a paragraph.  Additionally? Sometimes we have strategic reasons or psychological reasons to use empty subject. 

Here is a psychological construction, where you try to not be direct to the point of overplayed critique: If there is something I should know? Please contact me. 

Here is a strategic construction, where you are dealing with volatile or dangerous conditions: It is possible that my learned colleague misspoke....(rather than, my colleague misspoke).

What is an empty subject (short Quill web exhibit with examples? 

There is, are/was, were?will be

It is/was/will be

The subjects here are "there" and "it". Note that these words are placeholders for specific items. Why not tell the reader now?  Recall that the brain in looking for specific content to make sense of the sentence. Think lego!

Now: consider the verbs that pair with these empty subjects: ‘There is/are/will be,' ‘It is/was/will be,’ ‘This is/was/will be.' Empty subjects can occur in present, past, and future tenses.  One additional gain when you use direct subjects is that you reduce unnecessary words.  Concision is nearly always a virture for readers of non fiction. 

Another quick craft lesson on strategic repetition.

Percey used the F54 Pipetting Stilleto at his bench. The F54 Pipetting Stilleto performs two actions at once: puncturing the nuclear membrane and delivering the desired solution of metal ions.  This pipetting stilleto is attached to an electron microscope screen, which permits both viewing and recording of the piercing action.  It is fast becoming....

Did you notice the "it" in the last sentence fragment?  If we use empty subjects, we should wait until later in the paragraph to ensure that the reader is totally clear what the "it" refers back to.

Coffee cup  (check list, celery flow chart/arrangements, dummy text round-up). content. You must, by now, be clear about your team: Styro or Paper.  Doing so makes clear what content details you need in your paragraphs.  We can, though talk about the paragraphs that are common to both teams-->

First-person opening WITH PREVIEW OF RECOMMENDATION and basis of recommendation (energy efficiency/climate change OR Styrofoam/plastic fate in ocean and environment

Here is the short recommendation report on coffee cup choices that you requested.  I recommend X...I use X as the global environmental problem to frame my analysis.

Problem description in your office (Global to local)

use a referral link for a "global" metric on the problem

count out/"employee math" of a week or month's estimate of the cups used in office

Cup type definition: (count of three; reduce to two, compare contrast) See the "meh" paragraph discussion of last week.

you can do this without referral links but can use one if you like

if you use a specific metric, you do need a referral link

Define life cycle analysis (EPA is the best source); 

technical comment -- either use the block quote convention OR paraphrase

use a referral link 

Closing para sample:  

I hope this recommendation helps you.  I would say, however, that we can revisit this more carefully within our office.  Let me know if we should proceed with more work on this complex policy question. As you can see, both disposable cups pose serious environmental problems.  We can address them simultaneously vs. reusables but still, locally and globally, people select convenience.  That is a serious social choice problem.  

Getting these paragraphs done in rough form will help you climb a steep (writer's) cognitive wedge into this analysis. You have made a document already, right?

Hello.  Do not forget tonight's last peer collaboration in Eli Review. Complete on time for each other. Please.

Couple of items to clarify:

• Checklist is guidance. I modified the entry on authoritative sources (thank you, K, for question).
  • 
• If you are unclear about something, write a note at the beginning of your final submission. Grading can be a conversation and a learning moment.  You are used to evaluative grading. Summative grading is a practice that values learning over perfection.
• People are still confused about all the elements of the evaluation paragraph. Let's chat in class-->
  • You can "stack" or ask some of your sources to do double duty. Example: 
    • If you find a Davis paper that address both the stormwater and pollution categories with logos of numbers/details, then one peer reviewed source works here.  I am asking you to provide a detail about EACH of the two problems.  Note again, the power of thinking about that counting out strategy that neatens your writing.  Is a way to help reader experience lfow and coherence.
  • Stacking can also work with the two examples I ask you to provide. Why examples? People experience a sense of completion and clarity when you provide examples for definitional work, especially.
    • Variation with your referral links also helps you with stacking.  You could provide example(s) in the illustrating paragraph.  Heck, with skill, you could provide an example in the first paragraph. Take care, though, to honor the cognitive wedge. 
    • You can also punt and just please the two curated links at the end, making clear that you are sending the reader to quick visuals of local rain gardens.  Remember to use Maryland and/or Mid Atlantic examples.

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On to the problem-solution memo, aka Assignment 2.  Jane the boss is pleased with your rain garden work. As a follow up, the governor asked about which disposable coffee cup is better for the environment? This is our research question, aka CONJECTURE from stasis theory. Stasis always begins with a question.

For Wednesday, read for 15 minutes on the web about this question.  We will also note the craptastic AI-assisted take over of the famous Google algorithm.  I will point you to better ways, summarized below. 

OPTIONAL for Monday but here is Wednesday's note, early; If you are ready to prep for the coffee cup memo, here are the two researchers who hold founding ethos about the two cup choices:

1. Martin Hocking, research chemist at University of Victoria, BC, Canada. By Research Gate, you can see many of his articles over an incredibly long academic career. Here are the two foundational articles he published that compare the embodied energy of Styrofoam and paper hot beverage cups
   1. 1991 research results article (read abstract, as you likely will hit a paywall Springer.
   2. 1994 follow-up research letters (ditto above on pay wall but at Jstor, you get preview and not an abstract)
2. Charles Moore, marine biologist and oceans advocate, discovered these patches and began this line of inquiry:
   1. Algalita Foundation
   2. His list of publications here (Moore is typically not listed in Research Gate as he left academia to focus on ocean plastic).

Suggestion:  skim read for 15 minutes about Moore and Hocking,, with some attention paid to knowing enough to discuss this coffee cup recommendation memo. This NEW memo content is more complex and wide-ranging. Transitions are a way to thread the cognition for our busy readers. Your first memo focused on the definition stasis, with a evaluation move at the end.

And, Friday, I open the parking lot for Assignment 1: Rain garden memo; you have a week. to turn in.  Please email me when you post, so I can manage the documents and grade you quickly.

Today is Monday.

Be ontime for each each other tonight.  However, you can post on Tuesday if needed.  Heck, even Wednesday. However, please treat each other as you would wish to be treated.

We will walk through these documents from previous semesters to answer your questions, all in pursuit of learning cogntive frames and writing craft skills-->

• Office Hours in the Sky, a FAQ style page (Google docs) from an earlier semester
• Citation questions for Davis, aka the evaluation paragraph.

Speaking of the evaluation paragraph, here is a counting out technique that drills down a bit deeper:

Two types of environmental problems that are linked->

1. storm water run off, which can lead to erosion and local flooding
2. three classes of pollution, that can be sequestered/remedied by pooling in the rain garden bowl/soil media layers
   1. hydrocarbons
   2. heavy metals
   3. nutrients
      1. nitrogen 
      2. phosphorus

I bolded the two types of environment problems, which is the knowledge conditions that leads to me asking you to offer two bits of information from one or two of Alan's peer reviewed papers that you find.

We will talk about adding a courtesy link in Davis, to support readers and keep then from hitting a paywall. We can also talk about sending people to an abstract as a good overview source but caution about the paywall.